Day 28- Tears and Tragedies

Christmas. My VERY favorite time of year. I have been slacking off with my blog due to the holiday festivities, traveling and trying to wrap things up with my job. (I got laid off the Monday before Christmas but was required to work through today).

I have three days left of my little blog post project:
Day 28-Something that stresses you out
Day 29-3 Wishes
Day 30-a picture


For today's blog, it's not really about the stress, it's about tragedy overall. That feeling you get. The sinking in your stomach, the heavy chest, the tears that won't stop streaming. The feeling of loss. Over Christmas, J and I lost a friend. Micah. He was funny, light hearted and... a good guy.

J and I hadn't been that close to Micah for long but he was part of our crew. Floated the river each Sunday with our "Utah fam", came to the Dexter watch parties, our Utah fam nights, etc. When he was there, he always made you feel like you had known him forever.

Over Christmas, him and his new fiance (they got "officially" engaged on Christmas Eve) decided to go off-roading after the Christmas celebrations with his fam. By that evening, no one had heard from them. Sunday came and went, still not a word. His family called a search Monday morning. That afternoon they found his jeep. It had fallen down a ravine. He was still in the car and she had been ejected, landing on top of the upside down vehicle.

When we got the call, J and I were in shock. His best friend had been the one to let us know. I cried. I cried more for his family and his close friends then for him. Sounds terrible. But he was happy. He was finally in a good place and looking forward to the future. They say they died on impact and didn't suffer. I'm glad that he was in the happiest place in his life, doing what he loved with his favorite person.



Too many lives are cut short and so I hope that every one who might read this remembers to live theirs to the fullest. I think we all need reminders of how precious life is and it shouldn't take a tragedy to remind us of what is important.


Forgive.
Love.
Have no regrets.
Remember what truly matters.



My thoughts and prayers are with Micah and Kimmi's friends and families. You are greatly missed. May you rest in peace in the love of God forever.

Day 27-Pets

CLEO!

Sorry. I figure with how much I talk about her on here, you're already sick of her. But she is a hoot.

She has the biggest personality ever. She is so expressive and LOVES attention. She literally will just follow you around with her toys in her mouth and once she sees you stopping in a room she will just lay there and play with her toy. BUT she has to be WITH you at all times... cutest little thing.



We just had a friend who loved her so much that he went and bought a little boy pup like her. I'll take that as a compliment :)




I always wanted a dog that looked like an Ewok and when I got her, that is exactly what she looked like :) Now we think she looks like a mix between, an Ewok, Falcor when she is shaved (Never Ending Story), and Master Splinter when she is wet (Ninja Turtles).

I'm sure you can see the resemblance.




AND she loves the snow! Runs around and loves to trounce around in it! We got over 14 inches though which was taller than her... she was pretty freaked out about it.




She used to be dark but now looks more like a Maltese than a Shih-tzu. She is still the little light in my life :)

Day 26 - Picture of your Family

The Pack Family 2010



This is the pic we used for our first ever Christmas card :)

We just propped up my Nikon and used the timer so it was quite the chore to get Cleo to actually LOOK toward the camera.

It's officially Cleo's first Christmas with us and she is traveling to OK for the holidays. We have to fly with her as a carry-on so it will be rather interesting. I already purchased her seat (only 5 pets allowed per flight) and bought her travel bag... we're hoping the vet will give her something to make her sleepy for the flight :)

And it'll be her first time to meet this little doll...


When Reese saw J and I's Christmas Card, she took it over to my Dad and said: "This is Aunt Meggi and Uncle Joel... And this is Cleo, I love her." So cute!! Smartest 2 yr old I've ever met :) I'm a proud aunt!

PS> I just can't get over how cute their Christmas pics are :)

Day 24-nope.... How about Day 25-Put your iPod on shuffle, first 10 songs

Alright people... For some reason this posted without me publishing it... FREAKY... So here is the updated version.


Every time I thought about the Day 24 post (Day 24-Something you've learned) I just revert back to Day 12- What You Believe. So read that post instead. :)

So... on to Day 25 then, shall we?

Before I do this random song post nonsense, I would like to make a note... I am a SONG person, not a BAND person or a GENRE person. To me it is all about the way a song moves me. I am VERY much a music person and have found it to be a very important part of my life over the years.

As a youngin, music was my own little world. I would listen to tapes my parents had made for me and come up with all sorts of dances and routines. Then I would spend hours perfecting them. My favorite dance tunes were Yakkity Yak, Lollipop and of course the Beaches Soundtrack.

By middle school, my musical taste revolved around Spice Girls, Bush, the Pretty Woman Soundtrack, Garth Brooks and Backstreet Boys. Embarrassing? Yes, but still very dance worthy stuff. About this time, one of my best friends from gym had a rock song as her floor music. I remember being SO impressed and thus started my overall fascination and obsession with all things "songs" .....

So... iPod Shuffle:

1. DIXIE CHICKS - Not Ready to Make Nice
2. ELI YOUNG BAND - Guinevere
3. JOEL PACK - Talk Me Down
4. TOBY KEITH - God Love Her
5. DMB - Lover Lay Down
6. JASON BOLAND - When I'm Stoned
7. SHE & HIM - Take it Back
8. WEEN - Baby Bitch
9. THE AIRBORNE TOXIC EVENT - Sometime Around Midnight
10. CITIZEN COPE - Bullet and a Target


And ... since it's the holidays and I am MEGA Bored in a hotel room (and I have this amazingly intense love for ALL things Christmas) ... Here are my top 10 Fave Holiday Songs.

Disclaimer: I have a passion for the staple Christmas songs. Don't judge.

1. Baby it's Cold Outside - Zooey Deschanel's version on Elf is my fave but I just love this song in general! I am trying to find an amazing female to record a duet with my husband... if you have any suggestions, send them my way :)
2. O Come, O Come Emmanuel (If you haven't heard Enya's version, you should)
3. Carol of the Bells (by Mannheim Steamroller... love them... I'm a nerd)
4. Silver Bells
5. Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire
6. oh Holy Night
7. O, Come All Ye Faithful
8. We Three Kings
9. What Child is This
10. The First Noel
11. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas
12. Do you Hear What I hear
13. God Rest Ye Merry Gentleman (Comfort and Joy)


AND ... of course: Little Drummer Boy by Life Church in Oklahoma... I miss my church. This is a video they filmed from their Christmas worship service ... Come on, you can't beat a drum duet or bangin on some tin garbage cans during church! excited to go to it on the 26th :)

Day 23-Favorite vacation

I love vacations so pretty much every vacation is my favorite haha! I guess I will choose a theme...


SLC - December 2006 (2nd time I ever saw J when I came to visit him over Christmas)





SLC - March 2007 (My last visit to UT before moving there in April)



LA - October 2007 (J Proposed)


Riviera Maya - April 2008 (Honeymoon)

Day 22-Favorite city

Since I am sick, I don't really feel like putting much energy into a post. So... my current favorite city is (drum roll please) SALT LAKE!

haha! Lame, I know.

But seriously, I have really come into a positive relationship with it over the past year. My current love for this city is pretty shocking after how much I struggled with all of Utah for the first year I lived here. But I've finally become my own person here and I absolutely adore it. I remember when I decided to move here how lame I was expecting the city to be. I feel like the whole Mormon thing gives it a bad rap. But, if you ever get the chance to visit... you SHOULD! Once in summer and once in winter. Those seasons present completely different versions of the city.

SUMMER:
The best thing about SLC is the culture. SLC is a very music oriented town and there are always shows going on! Not to mention they also have an abundance of fairs and other outdoor activities. The Downtown Arts Festival is amazing! They block off a large area downtown next to the SLC Library. It has a ton of local artists as well as people who come out from neighboring states. They also have a lot of Live Performers and dance groups. SLC also has a large Belly-dancing culture and I've really enjoyed watching their performances. (Not to mention two of my really good friends are WONDERFUL belly-dancers!) Besides the Arts Festival, they also have the Live Green Festival, the Arts & Crafts Market, The Greek Festival, and several smaller type fairs and events (Sugarhouse, 9&9th, etc.).

The Downtown Alliance hosts this thing called The Pioneer Park Picture Show on Friday nights for a month in the middle of the summer. The most recent session was called Rock Docs. Basically they open one of the largest SLC parks and raise a giant screen. Bands play at 8 and the movie starts at dusk. The Rock Docs consists of films like The White Stripes most recent documentary.


Salt Lake is also famous for their Twilight Concert Series. It's an outdoor concert that is FREE. That's right folks, free! It is held in the same park in SLC every Thursday during the summer.

The 2010 performers were: Modest Mouse, Girl Talk, She & Him (Zooey Deschanel!), Beirut, Matisyahu, Big Boi, Chromeo, etc. Previous performers have been: Iron & Wine, The Black Keys, Broken Social Scene, Neko Case, Michael Franti, Peter Bjorn, etc.

It's pretty amazing and there are beer tents which make it even more fantastic! We live close to downtown so we spend like $4 bucks and take the Trax system to the shows. It's great because we don't have to worry about finding a DD or a parking spot :) Here's some of the 2010 photos.


WINTER:
Well, I'm not a skiier but if I was, this would be the place! It's only a half hour drive to Park City which is AMAZING. Not to mention that January brings in all the fun of The SUNDANCE FILM FESTIVAL.

Anyone who wants to visit SHOULD. I recommend Summer as it is my obvious favorite. :) 2010 marked the first year of the SLC Beer Fest. I didn't get to go this year due to a previous commitment but I can't wait for 2011's! We have some AMAZING local breweries and I can't even remember the last time I drank a non-local beer. We actually have a beer store down the street from us where you buy growlers and they fill them up with one of the beers they have on tap. The name is actually Beer Store... not joking. But it is amazing and cheap! My current favorite is the Raspberry Hef and the Pumpkin ale. I love knowing that I am supporting my community brewers with each purchase :) Not to mention they have an amazing brewed Root Beer.... that's right! AMAZING... especially if you mix it with Whip Cream Vodka. The perfect holiday drink.

AND If you haven't watched Beer Wars yet on Netflix.. you should!

Day 21-Picture of yourself

I'm choosing two pics instead of one. This has been heavy on my mind lately. It is the first year that I have officially been out of gymnastics longer than I was in it. (13 years in, 14 years out).



I have always had physical ailments due to it... but I am officially seeing CONSTANT physical effects from being so dedicated to a sport that wrecks your body. It is the ONLY reason I really regret being a gymnast. (That, and seeing the effect it had on so many friends over the years).

It's funny how time changes your perspective. I was told at 12 years old that I had the equivalent of 30 year old pro-athlete joints and I thought.... so? Now I know better. (I even had two elbow surgeries that are generally reserved for Major League Pitchers). I can't lift heavy objects with my hands because they either lock or give out and even typing has become a burden. I have constant hip pain that often wakes me up in the middle of the night. My wrist joints are so damaged that I can't even support holding a pot of noodles to try and drain it into the sink. I often worry about whether my wrists and hands will make it hard to hold our children when we have them. It makes me sad, honestly.



If anything, I hope this post doesn't sound like a whine fest but instead discourages anyone who reads it to put their children in this sport long term... or competitively for that matter. I learned so many wonderful life lessons and truly would not be who I am today without struggling through the injuries, overcoming physical fears, maintaining extreme dedication and reaping the rewards of all my hard work.

But, I should have left sooner.

Day 20-Nicknames

This is silly... Most of these names have long departed...


Meglegs
Beeker
Meggideath
Frick... or was I Frack... I do not remember
Rinker
Sporty
Sheppy


Recently:
Migo


This was a rather boring post....

Up Next... another Boring post....
Day 21-Picture of yourself

Day 19-Something you miss

My Family/Friends and Traditions in OK

I'm sad that I never get to see this little girl....
And that I have missed so much of her first two and a half years.



Sad I only get to see these people two or three times per YEAR.



Sad I can't just run errands, grab drinks, do CDB's or eat mexican with these girls....




And that I only see this girl once every four years...



Sad I haven't been to one of these since 2006...


Hopefully one day we will be able to spend more time with all of the above :)

Day 18-Something you regret

That I flew all the way to Oklahoma and spent my Papa's funeral at my parent's house puking in the bathroom. Still don't know whether it was food poisoning, a 24 hour flu or dehydration.... Either way, I would have really liked to have been at the funeral.

I really enjoyed getting to know him later in life and wish I would have spent more time with him before he moved to Florida.



Love you Papa! Rest in Peace. Happy to know you're with the Savior.

Day 17-Something you're looking forward to

If you know me, then you know that I am OBSESSED with holidays!! I just ADORE everything about them! AND... my three favorite holidays of the year are Christmas, Thanksgiving and Fourth of July!


I am SOOOOOO looking forward to the holidays this year. Last year we spent Thanksgiving in Vegas with our good friend Jess.





She organized a beer pong tourny and The Beer Brigade (AKA J & I) took first!





Whewhoo!! Unfortunately with my job situation and 11 paid days off for 18 months (I have two PTO days left until June 20th), we couldn't make the trip this year :( No defending our win ..... sad.



SO instead..... Two of J's sisters are blending their holiday meals this year so LUCKILY we are getting to eat with them and their families. I'm making J's mom's recipe ... HEAVENLY PUMPKIN PIE! It's completely hit or miss so let's hope this year's turns out as well as last year's did. I am also making my Mom's HELLO DOLLY SQUARES (which I have never made) and her SPINACH SOUFFLE (one of my fave foods in the ever!).

Also, J has a Thanksgiving tradition that we will be partaking in with our good friends Ryan and Jessie on Thanksgiving night. Every year, J watches the Big Lebowski and drinks White Russians. I got lucky that this is his only holiday tradition because I am kind of set on my Christmas tradition with my fam :)


SO... then comes DECEMBER!! And well, let's face it.... this is my FAVORITE time of year! F-A-V-O-R-I-T-E time of year!! Like to the point I got REALLY excited when everyone put up their trees and lights on November 1st :) We're having our Utah Christmas with Friends party the week before we leave for OK. With these wonderful folks....





Very Excited!


We're flyin in on the 21st, have our Shepherd Fam Christmas (Dad's side of family with aunt/uncle/cousins/etc) on the 22nd (which also happens to be at my fave restaurant in the EVER!), Girls Christmas Dinner on the 23rd, Christmas Eve tradition with fam and G-pa on 24th, then all the Christmas FESTIVITIES on 25th.... then fly home on the 26th. Sucks at how busy it always is.... wish we could stay for like 10 days.... Maybe when we're rich we'll get to ;)


Shepherd kids at Christmas 2008







Last year's girls dinner :)





So here's to looking forward to the next 5 weeks :) CHEERS!

Day 16-Dream house

The idea of a Dream House is difficult for me. I have so many different styles that I LOVE! But if I put them all in one house, people would think I am crazy.

I think right now, my dream house would have a fenced yard, several mature trees, a dishwasher, lots of storage/closets, 2 1/2 baths, three bedrooms and a bigger kitchen. AND..... a HUGE front porch :) I'm a southern girl at heart... I need a large front porch!

When we bought our house, we bought it with the intention of only living in it for just over three years. We also wanted an old house that we could put a lot of blood and sweat into... and we found it. Our house was built in 1923, the basement was added in 1932 so it has short ceilings which makes things with renovating pretty challenging. This is the newspaper clipping we found in the woodwork when we ripped out the stairs.



Also, since it is such an old house, they only built it with one closet. That's right folks... ONE closet in the ENTIRE house. Not only that, but the closet is over where they built the stairwell so it is a HALF closet. The picture makes it look like it has drawers... but those are just wood beams.



Frightening, isn't it. Anyways, I think my future dream home would just be a bigger, more modern version of what we have now :)

Here are the different styles and "themes" I love!! I tried to find the best photos I could to represent what is in my head :) It's so hard to forgo all of them and try to pick just one!

MODERN:
Simple. Minimalist. Sharp.

via

COUNTRY:
Warm. Inviting. Sophisticated.

via

And of course my country porch!

via

Old-World:
Elegant. Historic. Rich.

via

via

with a claw-foot tub of course ....

Hopefully one day :)

Day 15-Bible verse

My Favorite:

Day 14-A picture you love

Jenny... she moved to England and I miss her. I never get to see her because she always comes home to Oklahoma over Thanksgiving and J&I always go over Christmas. We are supposed to be visiting her in April but my current job situation has made saving difficult. This photo is from the day Joel and I moved to Vegas. Her and Matt happened to be vacationing in Vegas and we all got to hang out for the night. I love it because this is one of four photos where we were laughing our butts off! I miss her.... A LOT.

Day 13-Goals

Goals... I have always had kind of weird thinking about Goals. I make them very vague so that I don't disappoint myself. I know, I know... that is the exact opposite of how goals are supposed to be. Here are some goals... or a few things on my bucket list :)

• Write a Children's book and get it published with good distribution
  
• Embrace Yoga and regain the body I had in gymnastics
• Have at least one child and be the BEST mom/wife in the world :)
• Become fluent in Spanish
• Travel to the pyramids, the Louvre, London, Italy, Hawaii, Scotland, etc.
• Live in another country for at least three months
  
• Make money doing something I LOVE :)
• Get over my fear of lakes and learn how to water ski
  

Day 12-What you believe

This is a tough one for some reason. I think because my beliefs are always changing and evolving. That is something that I have really taken pride in since moving out of my little bubble. I enjoy that I am always learning, shifting, changing and growing in all sorts of directions. I think I am going to try and sum up a few of my core beliefs:

God is Good and sometimes Faith is all we have. - Life has been such a roller coaster and I think it's true that sometimes the best gifts in life are unanswered prayers. I have prayed for so many silly things over the years and was devastated when things turned out the opposite way of my desires... but as the years go by I have discovered that those unanswered prayers have been the greatest blessings because it brought me to where I am today. (Not to say that I don't still pray my little heart out, because I do)... Thank you Lord. God is Good. :)


Everyone has a story - This has been a struggle to grasp for me but I feel like I am finally learning to curb my other emotions and more than anything try to understand. I have always worked to try and be as nice to everyone as I would want them to be to me. However, like every other human, sometimes I can be quick to judge. But the truth is, EVERYONE has a story. Every person reacts to others on a predetermined set of actions, beliefs, preconceptions, etc. We all got to be where we are today by going through our own crap in life and many of our actions and reactions are just learned behavior from our own life path. For example, the waiter for dinner could be a total jerk and in a bad mood, etc. But maybe that's because he just got laid off and is working a crappy job to try and pay his family's bills. So the minute your nice and he realizes you understand and aren't going to take it out on his tip, he lightens up and brings you extra breadsticks or whatever. Get what I mean. That was a bad example maybe. But when I feel like someone is being intentionally cross with me or inappropriate, I work on being nice to them in whatever place they are at for that moment. It's amazing how that can turn a "rough" situation into a pleasant one in a split second. It's still a work in progress, but at least I am trying :)


Communication Solves Everything - This is probably the biggest thing I have learned since getting married. My husband is the biggest communicator and has really worked on me getting out of my non-communicative bubble. He always says this to me and my gosh, it is SO true. It's surprising how many people curb open communication on a daily basis. It seems like we all have this little filter on... don't get too personal, don't be vulnerable, don't put yourself out there, don't say anything that might come across offensive....etc, etc, etc. You'll be surprised how refreshing honesty can be in most situations when it's easier to go on auto-pilot. And the truth is, most people like to talk about themselves. So what's weird about getting personal? Try it, I think you'll be surprised. :)


Enthusiasm is crucial - the last core belief I will go into also happens to be one of my favorite quotes.

" Nobody grows old merely by living a number of years. We grow old by deserting our ideals. Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul. "
-Samuel Ullman

I don't think I could have summed it up any better! You must choose joy in life. It really is a choice and sometimes you have to work at it... (or at least I know I do!). Our lives aren't all glitz and glamor, sometimes you have to be enthusiastic about the little day-to-day things. Otherwise, what are you waiting for? In the words of Fight Club, "This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a time."


Maybe if I feel the spark, I'll write about some of my other beliefs.... this was actually one of my favorite posts to write I think :)

Day 11-Favorite tv shows

Two of my favorite shows have ended.... and I cried at both endings.




Thanks to HBO and ABC for these amazing shows and all the hours I spent loving every episode :)


My current FAVORITE show is.....



Airs Sunday evenings on Showtime. If you have not yet seen Dexter, you should go to Netflix and watch the first season RIGHT NOW. So good :)

Day 10-Something you're afraid of

Terribly scared of these! Bad enough that I had to Google search "cartoon snake" to make sure no actual photos came up. And I still had anxiety the whole time I was scrolling through the images, afraid a real picture might sneak in there. Lame I know.