2012 was nothing like I expected. It was more and less at the same time. Not in a bad way. Just in an honest way. To be honest, I had a fantastic year. It was so much more than I expected and honestly was wrapped up in a tight little bow. But it was an insightful year.
I started 2012 being thrown for a loop. I got really sick New Years Eve with a nasty respiratory thing (thanks to being allergic to some cute little pugs I saw at a New Years Eve party). It lasted over 3 weeks.... needless to say 2012 didn't start with a bang.
I spent months worrying about a family cruise we were leaving on in April due to my fear of boats. It would be a lie if I didn't say that I spent months of anxiety praying that it would all be okay. When we boarded the boat, I had an overwhelming sense of calm. I realized that with all my family on the same boat... I was okay. If something happened, I was with my family and my husband. I was exactly where I wanted to be.
It ended up being a fantastic trip and I couldn't have asked for a better opportunity to hang out with my family. I don't get to see them very often. Especially my cousins, aunt and uncle. But spending a week with them in the middle of the ocean... with no cellphones... no facebook.... no jobs ... it was pure bliss at its highest level.
2012 was the year I realized that Utah is now my home. Sure I will always be an Oklahoma girl... Sooner born and Sooner bred .... but it was the first year where I knew my place is in Utah. And the first year that I am truly okay with that. I will always miss my family and wish I could be just down the street from them. That I could run over for dinner. That I could take my niece and nephew for a "fun Aunt Meg day" ... that I could just be there. More. Often. Always. But Utah is my home.
2012 reminded me of the difference between "acquaintance" and "friend" ... It truly is amazing what time will do for friendships. I am thankful for the opportunity to reconnect with some of the women that have meant the most to me over my life. We were able to reestablish solid friendships on a foundation of nothing more than love and understanding. I am so grateful for these women. Despite the distance or the lack of communication that has happened over the years, they are truly my lifeline to the journey that got me where I am today. I am so blessed to call them friends and only hope I am as good to them as they are to me.
2012 showed me the importance of only filling the buckets that need filling. I saw this quote and I felt it was a slap across the face:
2012 humbled me in ways I can't describe. It tested every ounce of my being and my desire to be in control of my life. I know God has a plan but I think I just always try to help that plan along toward what I think is best … In every aspect of my life. I’ve learned that time can’t be controlled. This past Christmas was the first time I have really absorbed that not every Christmas will be the same. That the traditions I have held dear aren’t always going to be there. But that it’s okay. Traditions are molded with time. Life is just time in review.
And more than anything, 2012 showed me that I picked the right partner for the journey. The love, support, encouragement, and compassion I have received from J is hard to explain. I am so honored to be his wife and am beyond thankful and humbled that we were able to share 2012 together.
2012 tested who I am. The true core of me. It reminded me of the importance of friends. True, honest, raw friends. It solidified my love and admiration for my family. It showed me that there is a bigger plan in progress and that I should be humbled and honored to take the journey.
So here is to 2013. Here is to turning the big 3-0. Here is to a new journey, wherever this year takes us.
I leave you with a song from my husband's new band... mainly because I adore it. And hey, if you like James Bond... then that's just a bonus ;)
